loveyouhateyou

I kind of hate frogs.

I know, I know. Plenty of people love frogs to the extent they collect figurines of them. Many children’s decor schemes revolve around their friendly countenances. And yet, I hate.

Have you ever noticed frogs come out at the grossest times? When the world is wet and soggy and sloppy they emerge to jump and move at random and unpredictable intervals and get run over into giant patties of mush on roadways. I do not enjoy their texture, their movements, nor the overall look of them. They look diaphanous and vaguely creepy for reasons I cannot articulate. It is very likely a frog may have factored largely in a childhood trauma that I cannot remember because I just don’t LIKE them. The idea of people eating them squicks me out. The idea of someone picking one up or having a giant Plexiglas enclosure of them with no top (looking at you New Orleans aquarium) fills me with dread. DO NOT WANT. I hate you frogs.